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Buddha of Confusion
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Below are the 16 most recent journal entries recorded in je_Ci's LiveJournal:

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010
2:09 am
The teeth rise and fall to greet me...
Everything has felt so deathful lately. Staring at the moon was almost frightening as it grinned back with a half skeletal smile.
Sunday, January 24th, 2010
1:05 am
"The gods, that mortal beauty chase,
Still in a tree did end their race."
And upon that tree the hero hung,
The sacrifice of which the Edas sung,

What folly in this notion there seems to be,
For a human to be the companion of a tree.
Saturday, December 5th, 2009
6:58 am
A Skirt of Eyes and Blackness...
Sitting out beyond the reach of your life encompassed; a mask to shroud the satiation of lust, blood or otherwise. The fringe staring back with her eyes unblinking.

Hahaha yes, And at the edge of every map, 'Here Be Dragons.' Indeed. Always outside our surveyed hills and vales, and our bounds defined therein.
Monday, November 2nd, 2009
7:00 pm
Chameleon skin peeling off...
He feels like a ghost, holding up the sheets, moving to the music...

Current Mood: depressing
Thursday, October 29th, 2009
5:18 pm
Día de los Muertos...
Although it's a few days early, I'll leave you an offering of the ice cream that you loved that you could no longer taste.
Although it took me over a month to discover, I noticed your absence.
Although you were a bitter old man trapped in a young man's body you were dear to me.
Although we've not always gotten along, at the core of it you were still my friend.

And although you lived so much of your life discouraged, at the end you had set your sights on the stars...

Current Mood: heartbroken
Friday, October 23rd, 2009
4:46 am
A Point like Conception...
Something I came across in my manga purusal. (it reads right to left, ja)

Monday, October 19th, 2009
12:39 am
Aquatic dancing souls...
And the Octopus says: "I want to throw myself on the shore (but I have to put on this undersea play for everyone, as they wont understand a cephalopod who hates the sea)."

and the Crab understands, reflecting: "Sometimes it's a burden having a heart."

Current Mood: heartfelt
Friday, October 16th, 2009
4:22 am
"Change places!"
- I'm tired of being eaten by life.
Thursday, October 8th, 2009
6:42 pm
Gametes of the corona and eclipse...
"Here's a flower. Don't let the fact that its end is nigh detract from your appreciation of its beauty."
Friday, October 2nd, 2009
6:25 pm
Re: Arachnids
Not all spiders have eight eyes; Not all spiders have venom.

Current Mood: Pointed
Saturday, October 7th, 2006
3:16 am
The Past Inside the Present...
disembodied voice

resounded like yesterday

and faded to yesteryear

all in forty minutes time

Current Mood: unsure
Monday, June 5th, 2006
11:24 pm
I rebuke my earlier statements to supreme negativism...

sometimes you feel one thing when the reality encompases another..

Current Mood: mournful
Thursday, July 15th, 2004
11:53 pm
Tonight is one of those nights that I just feel like dying, not necessarily in a bad way mind you...

Though not necessarily in a good way either.

Current Mood: blah
Tuesday, June 29th, 2004
12:32 am
He went out this morning. Out onto the ancient lakebed revealed beneath the shifting white seas. Out into the dawn, the time of spirits and of inspiration. Out into the dream time before the awakening of man - the time of the cosmic consciousness.

On that cracked clay flat, he wept. Starring at the night sky he remembered three years ago; the place, the person. He screamed into the heavens and dropped to his knees and he wept.

Before those stars and those ancients, to those who he can no longer tell face to face, he wept. He missed them and he hoped that they were all happy. It sounded almost fasicious but he meant it. He couldn't speak very well as the emotions choked his words. He missed his friends and he remembered what it had been that was so important then. It hadn't been who they had gone to see, that didn't matter. It had been why they went, why they all had gone. It was that feeling, those people, that person that had mattered. He remembered sitting out in those dunes three years earlier feeling as he did - would be some of the last times he had felt that way.

The music in his heart then flowed out into the dawn, as tears still flowed down his face - and then he began to dance.
Monday, May 10th, 2004
1:25 am
"I have died, too. Now let's dance. We are free. The spirit is ours because we have died. Now we are resurrected from the ashes. Come, dance with me, sisters, brothers, relatives. I can never be alone because I have died. My ashes have blown to the wind. My blood has run into the earth. My bones have whitened and flowed into the clouds. I can never be alone again."
Monday, March 22nd, 2004
3:32 pm
Amidst the reatreat of the other gods...
Yesterday I got a call around dusk from Lauren. She exclaimed that we must drive to the top of a hill for sunset and I got ready as fast as I could and drove into the downtown to pick her up. So away we went to Los Osos valley road and up this hill. I swirved ever so slightly off of the road due to a passing car and popped my tire once more. Though I drove quite far on it before I realized that it indeed was flat.

So once again, here I am with Lauren changing a flat tire at dusk hahaha. Same fucking one too. So we're just talking about "sanity" and the idea of peer interaction. About realizing things by yourself without the help of contemporaries or others. First hand knowledge and how rare that is in life nowadays among a lot of people. We talked about creating a first step towards waking people up. A sort of zine. We'll see how this goes. I would be very interested in creating such a thing. She is such a synchronistic person, god, it surprises me sometimes.

So it gets darker but once we have the donut on the car we keep driving up the hill. It gets very windy and we endter into the fog bank. Needless to say between the darkness, the fog, the headlights and the 10mph turns I had to slow down quite signifigantly. So the road procedes throught the thick fog and up to a pastured area barely recognizable due to the dark-light and nebulous air.

Then it parts and the sky opens up above us.

We missed the sunset but it was okay. We drove down the road, and turned around and found a place to park near the pastures. The sight was held an emotion that is unconveyable with words.

The low sky was a light blue, the trace remains of the day and the sign of a growing dusk somewhere out at sea. There were jets trails between the lower and upper heavens and Venus shown almost immaterially in the firmament. The upper heavens were one of the most majestic sights I have ever seen. More detailed than I know if I've ever seen them, protected from the directionless ambience of the society below by the ocean of fog below us. It seperated worlds and elevated us onto a level of sheer discontinuity with the reality we had just been a part of. From where we park, to up the road we transcended the veil of fog to the spectacle I just conveyed. As simple as that we had moved between worlds. This new one was nothing like I had ever been in before. It was utter beauty and indescribable. It was like being in the last realm of the gods and goddesses of old. Their last sanctuary from the onslaught of man into their world. One of the last realms of magic and mystery.

Up there on that hill we sat and watched the stars and what moves through them and dreamt...


btw I got that tire replaced today hehe.

Current Mood: tranquilizing...
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